There Is No Perfect Time

The time to do anything is now or tomorrow or next. The earlier we realise that time waits for no one, the better for us. Now and then we postpone our happiness because we are trying to get a job first or migrate to another country, but we forget to realise that humans are insatiable, when you solve one problem, another one will pop up without being invited.

Another thing that we fail to realise is that we will die someday. We all came from somewhere and one day, we will return to where we came from. If you have the opportunity to help someone today, do it. That opportunity may never present itself again. I am a Nigerian and I have been to some burial ceremonies. I know you might be wondering why I am referring to it as a ceremony if you are not a Nigerian. Well in Nigeria, we throw a huge party to bury the dead. Growing up I found it strange, why should we be throwing a party for the dead? They don’t even realise what is going on, why not just bury them and we move on. Well burial ceremonies are thrown mostly for adults. Dead children are buried without a burial ceremony. Let me just get straight to the point, at these ceremonies, people who knew the dead person will come out to say how wonderful he/she was to him/her but they never got to tell the dead while he/she was still alive. If there are heart melting words that you want a person to hear, please tell him/her while he/she is still alive. Tomorrow might be too late. I tell my friends and family what they mean to me. I appreciate them when need be. I tell them I love them. I make them know their strengths and their flaws too so that they can keep renewing themselves. Stop holding back those kind words, say them to whom ever that needs to hear them.

Why postpone your happiness for something you have no control over? You are old enough to get married, you are comfortable financial wise, you have a fiancee who is dying to spend the rest of her life with you, but because you want to build a house first, you do not want to marry. You will see a man clocking 40 but he is still waiting for that job promotion or to travel out of the country before he ties the knot. Why postpone your happiness? What if you don’t get that promotion, what now happens? I have seen ladies turn down suitors because they want to reach the apex of their career before they get married. Let me tell our ladies something clear and straight, if you choose right, if you choose a man with sense and a supportive man, you will never have to worry about where your career pursuit ends or begins. Marriage is beautiful if you are doing it with the right person. If you are happy now and you marry right, you will be happier. Let us stop postponing our happiness for things that will take a long time to acquire. Imagine being in the medical field, You spend 7-8 years in the university and you have licensing exams to write which might take a year, then you have internship and afterwards residency. Do you want to finish residency before you settle down and have kids of your own? Think about it.

I love studying a lot and I think I can win a studying competition if there is anything like that. Within my 1-3 years of medical school, I denied myself lots of things and I wish that I didn’t. There are times I just feel like taking myself out to the restaurant to just relax and eat something different from my own cooking. Sometimes I just want to go to the swimming pool and swim to detox. Sometimes I just want to go to the movies with my friends and socialise. Well because of studying medicine and because I want to maintain my grades, I denied myself those little things that I really like.

I know very much well that sometimes you have to let go of somethings for others to fill in but we should not do this to the detriment of our own happiness. I think the problem I had then was time management. School was just on my neck, I had so much to study and many tests and exams to give. Looking back and thinking about it, if I take out 2 hours in a month to go to the restaurant, that wouldn’t affect my grades at all. If I spend 2 hours in a month at the cinema with my friends, that wouldn’t affect my grades either. Well I didn’t know then and now I know better. If you can manage your time well, whether as a student or a working class person, you will do anything you want to do. Let’s be guided and let’s be honest with ourselves, there are times you ought to prioritise and it is your duty to know what is more important; your happiness or your exam? Let us try and be smart in our decisions.

Adulthood comes with lots of baggage, you will get busier with work and immediate family that you forget to reach out to your other family and friends. Some people don’t even visit their parents anymore. Some people even find it difficult to call their family and friends to find out how they are doing. No matter how busy you get in life, find time to spend with people you love and love you too. If you acquire all the wealth in the world without people in it, you will be lonely and unhappy.

Reduce the way you use the word “when” in your vocabulary. “Oh I will buy that dress when I get a promotion.” By the time you get a promotion, the dress is gone. “Oh I will apply for that scholarship when I publish my article.” I understand that you feel less qualified for the scholarship, you really want to stand out before you apply. The truth is you might have a publication and still not get awarded, so why risk your chances? Just apply with what you have.

In life, you may never be fully ready for anything, so stop wasting time and just do what needs to be done. Let’s start using the word ‘doing’ more often in our vocabulary because THE TIME IS NOW.

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